So yesterday when I fired up Football Manager, decided to manage Real Zaragoza for the season. Figured hey, nice Spanish second division club, might not be rich but transfers should be simple right? Oh boy.
Starting point: Cash zero
First thing after taking the job? Went straight to finances tab. Big mistake. Transfers budget bar showed a fat freaking zero. €0. My reaction: “What the actual sht?”. Spent five minutes clicking everywhere thinking it’s glitched. Board literally gave me nothing. Not even spare change behind the sofa cushions.
My genius transfer plans… dead
Had this whole list ready: needed a faster left-back, maybe loan a young striker. Pulled up the scouting screen, got excited about three Argentinian wonderkids… then remembered my budget. €0. Felt like showing up at a car dealership with pocket lint. Scouting chief just stared blankly when I asked about transfer possibilities.
Panic mode kicks in
Started desperately hunting free agents. Like bargain bin digging at 3AM. Found this 34-year-old Brazilian keeper available. Scout report: “Dreads big matches”. Perfect! Offered trial anyway. Watched him in training – dude moved like his boots were filled with cement. Noped out instantly.
Then tried swap deals. Offered my backup right-winger to Leganes for their third-choice striker. They laughed and demanded €500K cash ON TOP of my player. Almost dropped my phone. Who do they think I am? Manchester City?
Reality slaps hard
Eventually called an emergency staff meeting (aka Googled “Zaragoza fm budget tips”). Learned two brutal truths:
- Salary cap is KING: Those €15k/wk bench players? Absolute killers. Had to ship out TWO backups just to free up €3k/wk wages
- Selling = breathing room: Took me all afternoon to negotiate sales for three deadwood players. Total fee? €300K. Board finally released… €150K. Celebrated like I won lottery.
Operation Bargain Ball
With actual money available:
- Loaned a Sevilla B-team striker paying just €1.5k/wk wages
- Signed a free agent center-back who “handles pressure okay” (guy sweats buckets during team talks but we roll with it)
- Snagged an 18yo Brazilian winger on deadline day for €50k – scout called it “low risk deal”
Final budget after blood/sweat: €1.4k per week wages free, €97k cash leftover. Not glamorous but hey, kept us under salary cap and fielding 11 players every week. Drank cheap beer to celebrate.
Biggest lesson? Managing transfers with no budget ain’t about buying players. It’s like dumpster diving while doing accounting meth. Every coin matters, every wage slice hurts. Should’ve negotiated better contracts first time round. Next season? I’ll bully the board faster.